It's happening again.
Four miscarriages since my last baby was born. Maybe five, if that really was a barely there line on that one pregnancy test.
My heart is aching. Literally, my chest hurts with wanting for something that is gone.
Only five weeks. Does it even count? It does to me. Maybe only to me. Why does this keep happening?
What do I do now?
It's sad to me that I have a miscarriage ritual now. I make and eat raw cookie dough, because you can do that reckless thing to your own body when it's not carrying a baby.
I looked it up: 1% of women will have recurrent miscarriages (2 or 3 in a row). Lucky me.
